i binged watched 13 reasons why this past week. It really hooked me in. Netflix is killin' it. i personally think the producers did a great job capturing the characters and how they connect in the story. They combined the present with flashbacks really well. Sure it's high school drama but i think its themes still can apply to all of us. There's issues of suicide, depression, sexual assault, domestic and substance abuse, friendships, relationships, bullying, gossip, and other social pressures.
13 Reasons Why is about a girl who commits suicide and left 13 tapes for people to listen to. Each tape tells a story of someone who contributed to why she decided to make her choice. The story could've gone a hundred different ways, but I like that it shows our human depravity and imperfections. We've all hurt someone somehow, by our words, actions or lack there of. The smallest of actions can have big consequences, for better or worse.
I think it reaffirmed my pursuit of going into the mental health profession of counseling. There are tons of ppl hurting with various problems, and sometimes all they need is someone willing to help, listen and care.
Quotes
"Are you being bullied?
Am I being bullied?
What if I was the bully mom?
Would you want to know that?
You would never be a bully
How do you know that?
Because I know you. Because you're a good kid.
Maybe there aren't any good kids."
"You don't f*ck with another dude's car"
"I think i'm losing my sh*t
Sh*t is overrated. lose it."
"Would you just shut up tony?
I get so sick of your little sayings and things you point out acting all wise
You're like this unhelpful yoda"
"all guys are assholes. some are assholes all the time, all are assholes some of the time"
"I was going to work harder. be smarter. and be stronger. because u cant change other people, but you can change yourself."
"you cant go back to how things were or how you thought they were. All you really have is now.
"Dream big of all the things you can be. Don't settle."
"Some of you care. None of you cared enough."
"It has to get better. The way we treat each other and look out for each other. It has to get better somehow."
If u know me at all, u probably know that i live too much in my head. i guess it's ironic to blog my thoughts about how i overthink. my therapist once said that she thinks i get easily overwhelmed. that's probably true. I overthink, over analyze, and can take things too seriously. Sure there's a time to reflect, meditate and observe, but too much is no bueno.
has anyone ever made a comment that is meant to be a joke but u jus take it too seriously or personally? sometimes we view our tiny first world problems in great fear, as if it's something chaostropic. keep it simple stupid. don't sweat the small stuff.
One of the best ways to turn my head off is to focus on something else.. like playing games, watching movies, exercising or listening to music. my mind can get too active and hyper and it needs to jus chill out more. What are things that help you to calm down and relax? Sometimes just taking a few deep breaths really does help.
Do u ever re-read and over analyze what u write and think to yourself, hmm maybe i could say this in a better way, maybe i could use better words, maybe i shouldn't say this at all, why does my grammar and spelling suck? how can i edit this? how might this be misinterpreted? what the heck exactly am i even saying this and why bother? i feel like im constantly trying to connect and organize my thoughts into words so me no sound dumb.
Sometimes i put too much care and meaning into things or people when it should be pretty easy and simple. i can go a bit overboard. Sometimes less is more. Sometimes i exaggerate my problems and make them more complicated than they are.
ive always been pretty critical and hard on myself. with somethings i can be too much of a perfectionist. i worry about what i said or did or what i didn't say or do, or what i might say or do, or how it was interpreted.
Sometimes i regret saying something stupid that i can't take back, sometimes i regret not speaking up and saying something when i should've. It takes confidence and courage to speak up, wisdom to know when to bite your tongue, and great discernment to know when to speak or withhold.
I think i worry too much. Sometimes i think of all the alternative choices or possible worlds that could be if i made a different choice, (probably why i like turn based strategy games so much). sometimes im so afraid of making the wrong choice i can't decide to go left or right. Im rarely ever 100% confident in any of my decisions lately. What do u want to eat? im like 60% sure i want somen salad, and 40% sure i want eggs and rice. and sometimes u jus hafta make decisions even if ur not entirely sure.
When i do make a wrong choice i hold so much anger toward myself. i say ah shucks, i should've done it like this, i should of said it better, i shouldn't have said or done x, y and z. Sometimes i catastrophize and think the worse is going to happen. What if i end up alone forever? What if i amount to nothing? What if i lose everything and everyone i care about? What if i make a huge mistake? What if im jus a disappointment, a failure, and a screw up? Negative thinking does us no good.
we're gonnd make mistakes. it's part of being human. and i guess failure and mistakes are part of the learning process to make better decisions. And when we do goof up, we cant dwell and internalize them for too long, or they'll jus eat us up into we're paralyzed. All we can do is try our best next time.
I admire those who are cheerful, carefree and lighthearted. Sometimes i wish i could be like my cat. He jus chills all day, and is always so relaxed.
God is always available to take away our worries, fears, doubts, anxious thoughts, and burdens. In the midst of our pain, emptiness and brokenness, it's amazing how he can give us stillness and peace. He gives us living water, only he can satisfy. I usually try to find escapes through other means, when ultimately he is the only one who has the power to give us true rest, comfort and peace.
Simplicity
Be kind, compassionate and gentle to yourself.
Stop overthinking
Meditate
Everything will be alright
Kill negative thoughts
Try to be more positive
Relax
Don't take things too seriously
