I never had to pray for a homework assignment, but I learned a lot through praying for 45 minutes. Even though this praying time was for a spiritual formation project and class requirement I felt that it was desperately needed for my soul. Praying also helped me rediscover how important it is to just sit at His feet. I haven’t prayed that long for a while. I usually find it hard to just sit down and pray for longer than 5 minutes. My mind often wonders and gets distracted by other thoughts. But for this prayer project, I was quite successful in keeping my focus on spending time and praying.
After I dimmed the lights, turned on some calm worship music, and sat down, I decided to start by praying aloud. I think praying aloud helped me to focus on communicating my thoughts to God. I was also trying to be careful not to fall asleep. I also used a journal to write out some things I wanted to pray for, and had no problem filling out a few pages with ideas.
Eventually I got too comfortable on my couch and almost caught myself falling asleep. So I did some jumping jacks and push ups to get my blood flowing again. Then I just sat up straight and ended up with kneeling with my face to the ground.
I mostly prayed for how God could help me grow spiritually. I did pray for individuals who were sick, lonely, and who don’t know Jesus. I think I covered about 20 people within my family and friends. I tried to be more specific in praying for them because otherwise my prayers just seemed to be meaningless words.
I prayed for my roommates who are going through a rough conflict. I know that they are both hurt and need much healing. I also prayed that I would be able to find a good church ministry to be apart of and to also meet some new friends. I prayed for those who are lost, hungry and are in desperate need. I prayed for the lost, and that my compassion would grow for those who don’t know Christ. I also prayed for people in Haiti, even though I don’t know exactly how bad it is over there.
God says to ask things according to His will in His Name and that He would freely give it to us. I basically exercised that by asking God for a lot of things. The things I prayed for myself included maturity, humility, discipline, righteousness, motivation, joyful obedience, focus, submission, stronger trust, forgiveness, peace, patience, spiritual consistency, deeper repentance, clear understanding, discernment, and to grow into the likeness of Jesus.
Other categories that I focused on were how I should deal with bad dreams, because I had a pretty disturbing dream this morning. I cried out for purity and holiness of my thoughts. I prayed for God to protect my mind, eyes and heart. I noticed I feel a lot farther from God when I allow my sin to corrupt my thoughts and actions. I prayed that I would guard what goes into my mind, and that even my thought life would worship Him.
I prayed for a more intimate relationship with God, where I can spend more intentional and quality time with Him. I want to truly learn what it means to abide in His love and to be engulfed by His Holy Spirit. I prayed for God to change my heart. That I might decrease so that He would increase in my life. I prayed for complete surrender and to increase in faith. I desired that I would be able to desire Him more, and that He would help me to love Him. I realized I can’t really do anything on my own strength. I want to practice emptying myself and allowing Him to fill me to a point where His love overflows out of me. I could really improve on loving others. But I was reminded that the more I absorb and soak God’s love, the easier it becomes to love others.
I shortly prayed for how He would reveal His will to me. I have been a little unsure if I was on the right path, and He made it quite clear that this is where I should be. And He also reminded me that I should just trust His guidance as He leads me step by step. I prayed that my desires would conform to His desires. I want my heart to bleed and burn desperately for Christ alone. I want to grow in His likeness and to know His heart. I want my heart to switch into a joyful mood and be more thankful for His grace. Sometimes just desiring to desire God more helps me to be more reflective.
Lately, I have been compromising in how I spend my time. Often I would rather spend time on the computer or sleep than read my devotions. So I prayed that my hunger for God’s Word and that my thirst for intimacy would sky rocket. I prayed that I would be steadfast, immovable, always abounding and rooted on top of Christ the solid Rock. I prayed that I would continue to grow and bear much fruit. I prayed that I would be a light and not hesitate to witness to others. I prayed that I would take just a step closer and closer to Him. I prayed that I would be relentless in my pursuit of His righteousness and not let sin stand in my way. And I was reminded of how sufficient and satisfied I am in Christ alone. Worry and fear have no place in my life. I want to rely solely on God alone.
I have been a little stressed out with things and very distracted from spending quality time with God. I broke out in hives the other day, and had to see a doctor for my reoccurring ulcerate colitis. I have been so burnt out that I had forgotten to pray about my troubles. I wish that I could pray and turn to God immediately no matter how big or small the issue may be. I prayed that I would begin to pray more, because I definitely lack in talking directly to God.
I often think about God. I can read about Him in scripture. I can write pages about Him and His salvation. I can listen to hours of sermons. But I realized that I don’t nearly spend enough time talking directly to God. I realized that He is always waiting for me to come to Him in prayer. And that He always gives me His full attention. I guess I just need to find the right habit of meeting with God one on one. I need to practice waiting and listening to His voice. I just want to be more intentional with being absolutely alone with my Abba Father. Another lesson is that I never have to ask Him for His love, because He is always loving me intensely.
“I tell you the truth, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.”- John 16:23
“Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.”
–Psalm 63:3
“I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” –Gal 2:20
“We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us. This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, expressing spiritual truths in spiritual words.”
-1 Cor 2:12-13
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