Being with God

For school we had to spend 30 minutes listening to God. Later on I'll have to do a 24 hour retreat outside of home. That's hard to do when your usually pressed on time. But it's refreshing to hear from God especially when I've been absent for so long. Anyway, here's a short meditation..
It's great when God speaks to you and comforts you when it's spontaneous and not expected. It's great to feel the warmth of His love, and His peace that passes all understanding. But lately I've been having a hard time trying to listen to God because many times I do expect to hear some sort of message from God. Many times I don't pick up what God wants me to hear. I've struggled with spiritual disciplines because I usually want an immediate fix for my needs, or at least some assurance that He is right there with me. As of late, I have been impatient and sort of anxious. Listening to God for 30 minutes was challenging. And I don't think spending time with God should be. Spending time with God should be something we love and desire to do. To consciously and intentionally direct my heart, mind and thoughts upon God can be difficult. I found myself to be easy distracted and would think of other things that I wanted to do.

I finally lied down on the carpet next to my 2 cats. They were just resting. Sometimes when I try to hug them they just run away or bite and scratch me. But I realized that God just wants to spend time with me, and I am often too stubborn to receive from Him. I grow impatient. But this time, my cat just laid his head on my arm. In the same way, God delights in us when we simply find rest in Him. I think God was trying to tell me how much He values being in communion with me. It's not about doing, but being. God calls us to simply be with Him.

I was then listening to a pastor give a message on the radio. I didn't really like the sermon because it felt he was giving the congregation a guilt trip for not tithing. I don't think it's right for leaders to pressure people, especially when it becomes all about the money. Plus I believe tithing should be what each purposes in his or her heart to give. So I was a little upset about how the pastor was giving his sermon.

Then i started to pray for Japan and the tsunami that recently happened. My friends and family are in Hawaii, and I was happy to hear that nothing serious affected Hawaii. I then thought about how devastating the damage in Japan was and how all the families, schools and homes were affected. I then got upset because I remember reading a friend on twitter complain about how it was raining, or something about her nails. Sometimes we get so bugged down by little things, and aren't grateful for all the blessings. I know I take so many things for granted. Christians are being persecuted, people have major illnesses, and I have a hard time doing devotions or homework.

So as I was taking out the trash, I saw a little girl playing in the street. I was reminded of God's beauty in creation. This girl gave me a big "Hello!" with a smile on her face. As I walked back I was in awe of God's creation. I was amazed at how far the blue sky stretched, how the sun was shining, and the trees were waving. Sometimes it's great to see the world as a child again, and stopping to see how vivid and colorful life can be. So the two things I got from spending time with God was to just be with Him, waiting still in faith, and also to appreciate life and the beauty of His creation.