Hope

a lot happened today. once in a while i'll have those days where it's like.. oh snap.. i cant wait to go home to blog about this before i forget all my awesome thoughts. lol
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lately I was thinking of how our careers are somewhat connected to our identity and sense of fulfillment. Usually I would rather argue that our jobs definitely don't make up our identity and who we are. But the truth is that what we do on a daily and weekly basis does impact who we are and who we're called to be. Like.. someitmes i feel like a tool in a toolbox, collecting dust in a garage closet. Created for a purpose but not being useful. So today it felt empowering to actually use the skills i've been trained in to help someone.  Uhh so yeah. in case management i basically help people with their entire holistic health, living situation, and specifically their mental health. Mental health is actually a gigantic and broad field.

I got to meet with a guy today. I could kind of see a little of myself in the things that he was going through. We talked about family, school, work, friends, church, God, exercise, hobbies, how to cope with stress and depression. Usually counselors are told to be careful of counter transference, but i definitely resonated with him. I feel like God equipped me with both counseling psychology and theological pastoral ministry skills to help this guy who was in need. And because I went thru a lot of my own case of depression, it made it so much easier to get a sense of what this guy was facing. Not only the darkness, but also how to keep fighting to move towards the light and find healing in the midst of his history of pain.

I basically took the opportunity to share the gospel of God's grace and how God is always there with us to help us get better and find strength, encouragement and peace. I could tell how lost this guy felt. Like i could just sense the brokenness. But in all of that, I had the confidence to tell him that we can take positive steps in the right direction, one day at a time. And that depression and other mental health issues can get better with treatment. So it was cool that i actually got to integrate psychology and theology to help this guy find some sense of hope. If u can give hope to the hopeless, i think that's a victory. To actually coming to a point where they want to change, find transformation, growth and healing.

for the past several months, ive been praying, contemplating and meditating on something. And I feel like God has reaffirmed me over and over, to give me more confidence and clarity. It's awesome when God's spirit somehow speaks to your soul. sometimes it's not even verbal, but u just know what God is nudging you to act upon. I doubt and second guess myself. I over analyze and make up excuses. But through all of that, God calls me to just simply trust him and to walk by faith. So even tho I don't know exactly every twist and turn, i know that God has pointed me in the right direction to move in. I guess i feel more at peace knowing that God is always with me, guiding me and empowering me. And i guess ive gained more confidence, not only in myself but also in God's provision.

Sometimes.. u can just meet the status quo.. and that's ehh alright. But a lot of the times, u can definitely go out of your way to really make an impact, to really make someone's day better. maybe it's giving them a small gift, saying a small compliment, giving a bold encouragement, or giving them more of your time to listen and chat. I'm learning that.. we shouldn't hesitate to go the extra mile to show compassion and care. it's really those small gestures that make a big impact.
gosh what was i gonna say now.. uhh hold on a sec, it'll come to me.. ohh yeah. so because i was in the area, i went to go visit my job. and it was refreshing to see familiar faces. 4 people all said that i looked good and that i looked happier. And i was like whaaat? but i think that's true. Even tho i still deal with a lot of stress, i feel like i have the ability to handle it. And in a way i do feel lighter and more optimistic. It's pretty rare for ppl to say that i seem different and happier. so that kinda made me feel even better lol. I think knowing a sense of your purpose, and then actually being able do what you've been called to do definitely does feel satisfying. in a way u feel fulfilled and find significance, when you're able to see the larger picture outside of yourself, but knowing that you play a part in God's plans. err somethin like that.. lol

Another thing i think that's super important.. like if u didn't already read my hundreds of blogs.. is how important soul care is. like really fine tuning how you spend your time. time for work, time to exercise, time to rest, etc. like.. finding a healthy balance where u don't get burnt out. i feel like a lot of the time, i'm doing everything i can to conserve my energy. and then like a tiger.. when it's time to go all out and be on top of your game u have all that energy stored up to use. and then u go back to conserving your energy lol. k tired of blogging jalfjdlk;jfald