More Than Enough

Its been like 3 weeks since i last blogged. I finally i have some time to sit down and share everything on my mind. Ive been so overwhelmed with my thoughts, i really need to record them down and drain out my head. I know ppl dont actually wanna read all of this, and i dont expect anyone to since its so long. But if i were writing this for people, i would make it short n sweet, n probably more humorous. But because its primarily for God, i really need to jus clear my thoughts, and lay it all down at His feet.  You might wanna buckle up your seat belt, because its gonna be a long ride. lol, btw my nose is so stuffy n runny right now, its not even funny, But hey God created snot, so im grateful, lol i wonder if Jesus ever had a stuffy nose, boogers or even sneezed? People would hafta say, "Bless yourself" lol

I think it all starts with seeking truth. Seeking answers, understanding urself and others, understanding human behavior, observing life, pondering how we fit into God's plan, and learning how to adapt to these truths. For instance, When i learn more about myself and my identity, i figure out my purpose. Identity = Purpose. When you find who you are in God, you find God's role for you. It's amazing how much we can learn about ourselves by just self reflecting.

In order to share Christ, you need to build on relationships. Yes you can do street evangelism which can be effective, but we already have such an impact on our preexisting relationships. The best place to start evangelizing is right in our family n friends. We have a super strong impact on those who already know us. Think of all ur family and friends. When's the last time you had a deep conversation?

Why so much emphasis on relationships and old friends? because we need to learn effective communication. Having a relationship with someone, is an open door to sharing God's love. Communication + Love = A stronger relationship. The stronger a relationship, the easier it is to share Christ. Think about it. Think about how you communicate with others. How do you listen n understand another? Are you more concerned about urself, or actually care about other ppl's thoughts? People who majority talk about themselves, consider it a good conversation. So ask people how they are, and what's been going on in their lives. People have a numerous amount of problems, but they all point to one super awesome, best solution. People dont realize how God is the answer to all problems. In our communication, it takes choke practice to direct conversations towards Him. How do we get others to think of higher thoughts? People already see the corruption of the world, But what many dont see is God. It's easy to have ordinary routine conversations, about school, work, and what's happening over the weekend. So how do we ease into a talk about Jesus? How do we get people to start pondering these deep questions, and seeking truth? How do we get people to huger God? I dont think jus living as an example will be enough. Often times we are required to step outside our safety box to help someone out. Show them God's love through actions. Ask them, hey could i pray for you? And then follow up by actually helping them out in their situation.

uhmm..kinda got off topic, but yeah.. how do we communicate with others? We can speak the truth about God, But are we speaking the truth IN LOVE? If we're called to save people, we need need need to watch how we work with others. It's quite easy to become a pharisee. One of the reasons ppl are so turned off by Christians, is because they can become very judgmental, forceful, hypocritical, liberal, and offensive. We as Christians need to find that BALANCE of speaking to others. We shouldnt shy away n become passive, nor should we become too strong or aggressive. But the bottom line is that we need to watch how we communicate and love another. If everyone is talking, then who's listening? We cant learn, if we dont listen. We cant teach if we dont speak up. We cant love, if we put ourselves first.

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."
(Phil 2:3-4)

It's through our approach of communication and actions, that we get people to think. When ppl think about stuff like life, death, truth, and religion, they begin to seek God. Our small gestures, like a simple smile, can go a long way. So next time ur not in a hurry, jus stop for a second to greet someone, sit down and chat about life, truly listen and care whats on their minds, and lastly, love through communication.

I learned that surrendering, dying to ourselves, giving up our sinful desires, walking in faith, sanctification, repentance and seeking His will is something we need need to do EVERYDAY. Often times i have a hard time getting into that zone of intimate prayer. Sometimes i get completely lost, and dont understand His word. Sometimes my laziness, or busyness gets the best of me. Surrendering to God is not a flu shot. Everyday we have to ask God to take all that we are and Ask Him to use us to the fullest, for we are His to use. Continue to thirst, hunger, desire, surrender, and change ur heart towards Him, for He will always satisfy. When we die to ourselves and desperately reach out to Him, God will overflow our cups, engulf us with His Spirit, and surround us with His love. He is more than enough. His grace and victory over sin is more than sufficient. God is always just, always sovereign, always faithful, and He never once makes a mistake. Christ was perfect and obedient till death. He descended from heaven, humbled himself, and made himself nothing. He fulfilled over 300 of prophecies, which is beyond chance. The odds of someone fulfilling jus 48 of those prophecies is 1 X 10 to the 157th power. Thats like shaking up all universes, and picking up a specific grain of sand on the first try!

As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. (Isaiah 55:10-11)

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD."
(Jer 29:11-14)

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."
(Romans 8:28)

"The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance."
(2Peter 3:9)

God is always sovereign. He is always in control. He always loves. God is love. His love is unchanging. His will, will be done. All his promises will be fulfilled. He reigns over everything. God was, is and will always be. He is beyond our knowledge, and our comprehension. We dont always know why or how He works, but His will is perfect. His perfect love and being casts out all fear n darkness.

I cant help but emphasize how great a Father He is. No one compares to Him. There is no other god. I always like to people watch, and observe how parents watch their children. I saw a father sitting by the edge the pool, jus watching His little children swim in the shallow water. He jus smiled, and made sure they were happy and safe. He probably would've jumped in to save them instantly, if they swam too far off into the deep, or started to drown. All children love to latch on to ppl while their swimming. They realize that "Hey im a little person, and my swimming skills arnt too great, but i trust that my father will take care of me, so i should hold on to him." All kids cling on to their parents, like little monkeys. Parents are most satisfied when their children smile, giggle and love them back. They are most glorified, when their love is reciprocated back. God celebrates and rejoices when His lost son returns home. As fathers love spending time with their kids, God loves spending time with us.

Ive been growing so rapid by just hanging around other Christians. Ive learn alot from jus hanging around n listening to strong Christians, I also learn a lot from reading books, of which my favorite is called the Bible, and i actually got to meet the author personally! lol.. Ive also learned choke knowledge from listening to Christian talk radio stations. I get to soak up on sermons, apologetics, Christian issues,  and learn more about His word. God reveals and teaches us many things, in a variety of ways.

When we decrease, God can increase. When we are weak, God is strong. When we humble ourselves, and spend time with God in prayer, we receive a peace and spiritual rest in Him. After we are charged with His Spirit, soaked up in His word, and engulfed in His love, our spirits become so alive and burn for more intimacy with Him. Our lips want to sing songs of praise, our spirits rejoice in His glory, and God dances over us as we draw closer to Him.

We are the salt and light of this earth. If we lose our flavor or hide our light, we arnt living completely for Him. He calls us to share the wonderful message of the good news. Many Christians are honestly getting too comfortable. And i'll be the first to admit it, because we arnt perfect. But its become too convenient to be lazy and selfish in our own ways. We need to be bold in our faith, and persevere through trials. God disciplines those He loves. God calls us to be His ambassadors, royal priest, shepherds, workmanship, teachers and leaders of His people.

God keeps telling me, "Lead my people." And i say "But God thats kinda hard, i dont think im best qualified to lead." then He responds, "Brah no worries, I will make you strong in me." He revealed that He's going to use me as a teacher of His word. He's been revealing so much truth, knowledge, and wisdom lately, i can barely contain it all. I tell God, "Hey i dunno if i can really teach all ur truths clearly. I have a really hard time speaking sometimes." God responds, "I will speak through you, and give you the words to say." Im like "Ho snap! this is jus like Moses!" God basically said to me, "I gave you life and everything that you are. Your mine. You belong to me. You dont own urself. I created you. I make your heart beat everyday. And im going to use you for my purpose." So im like "Ho shooooots! Take all of me God! Im all yours!"

God, i cant wait to meet you face to face in your perfect, glorious, heavenly kingdom. God you are better than life. You are more than enough. Everything else is meaningless without you. Life is nothing without ur love. Your the best Dad in the world! You never stop loving us. God stir up a heart that beats for you. May we glorify you, and be like your perfect Son, Jesus. I want to be as close to you as possible. I repent of our wicked ways. And thank you for the forgiveness that we dont deserve. Its by your mercy n patience, that you paid the price of our wrath. You made Him who had no sin, to be sin for us. And then its by your grace, that you've given us a wonderful new life with you. Sharpen us, train us, and send us out to do your will. Help us to be instantly obedient, without any hesitation. Let us leap out in action, and live out our faith. Teach us how to lead others towards you. Teach us how to speak to others. Teach us how to die to ourselves everyday. Teach us how to effectively listen and learn from you. Teach us to be humble, gentle and Christ centered. Teach us how to forgive as u forgave us. And teach us to how to love, as ur children of righteousness. Remind us, that its not about us, or what we do. Remind us that its all about You! and what you've already done! Let our only desire be to please You. I love you Lord! Amen.

Perseverance

Trials n tribulations require greater resistance. And therefore require greater effort, which produces greater strength. We cant continue to do the same things over and over, and expect a different outcome. If i only stayed at lifting 5pound weights, i wouldnt get any stronger. But if i stepped it up to 10pounds, then 20pounds, i would increase in strength. Im honestly, a really safe person and stay within my comfort zone. Im selfish, im lazy. I dont like change. I dont like new grounds, and i like to stay in my safe little box. God says "Live for me!" and i say, "eee! but God, its hard and uncomfortable for me". He then says "Have faith! Trust me! I will strengthen you through this." then i say "ok God. If you say so." God wants me to take more initiative. Yes im shy and often a scary cat when it comes to stepping up to the plate. But God reminds me, Hes with me each step. Ive learned so much about myself. His word tells us to examine ourselves, so that we can improve on our weaknesses. So lately ive been working on being more personable with people. Understanding, listening and communicating with others help form healthy relationships. Connecting with them allows us to love.

Sweeter Than Honey

So this weekend i went to camp mokele'ia again. Aaron Larson, who is an executive producer, and pastor at One Love came to talk. He gave messages on the importance of God's word, being a disciple, faith and desiring God. I honestly didnt take anything too new from his sermons, but did enjoy getting to talk to him one on one.

I did like when he touched on having an appetite for God. He mentioned we shouldnt hafta force ourselves to eat our favorite food. We normally gobble down our favorite food, and just want more. In the same way, we need to be starving to spend time with Him, to pray, to worship, to gobble up His word, and most of all starve for His amazing love. God definitely reveals more to us when we are desperately desiring more.

We read through 1Corithians CH1-3 for devotions. I love doing devotions with small groups at camp. We should make more effort to do devotions with one another. We go into so much further depth, when we meditate on small bites of scripture. These chapters talk about following God and not man. People would say "I follow Paul", or "I follow Apollos", when we should be chasing after Christ. Yes, he uses men to plant and water a seed, but it's ultimately God who makes it grow. We are only but mere men, and God's workmanship. God is God.

"For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength." 1Cor 1:25

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,
declares the LORD.
As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

God is so much bigger than us! and no matter how many times i hear that, i still forget. I still try to rely on my own. I get caught falling into my own desires, running on my own bit of energy, and fall on my own prideful ways. Every time we sin, its because of our prideful flesh. We can know truth, but how much harder it is to live by truth. We must continue to die to ourselves, and conform to His will. We try so hard to hold on to our little, puny, dry pools of water, while God is waiting to give us an entire ocean of living water. God breaks down our walls, and tells us to take faith in His promises. He's wisdom, ways, and thoughts are > i

I also like goin to their camps, becuz it gives me a chance to see friends, meet new friends, have awesome conversations, meditate on the beach, find family unity among Christians who hardly know each other, and surrendering in hardcore worship. God is always my highlight of camps, but at these camps, He teaches me so much through a little 6 yr old girl.

Its amazing how much a 1st grader can teach us. I have such a strong connection to this little girl named Angelic. She taught me through her smiles, laughter and attachment. She would give funny, silly smiles, that showed her genuine joy. She would lose in a laughing contest, because she is so full of bright laughter. She always yells "Uncle Chris!" as she comes running up to give me a big hug from behind.


So why did i learn so much from her smiles, laughter, and attachment? Because God the Father, calls us His children! Our hearts should be full of joy, full of smiles up to heaven, and just standing in awe of Him. We need to enjoy life with Him, praising Him in our laughter. And lastly, we need that attachment to Him. Finding our comfort, safety, and peace in His love. So smile, laugh, and love with one another. Be a little happy kid, with nothing but joy for our Heavenly Father. Run, jump, and cling on to Him in laughter and love.

Tonight i went over to my Uncle's mansion house, and got to share my faith with my mom's side of the family. My uncle and auntie are considering getting a divorce. So we got to gather around as a small family and show our support. We shared deep feelings, and everything really came out. Other family members spoke of difficult times in their past divorces, and how they thought divorce meant the end of the road. But my other uncle and i got to seriously share Christ as the answer to them. I was like the only one who didnt cry during our family discussion. Everyone was balling n using toilet paper. Everyone tried to remain strong, but God swept our feet with emotion. Least little mochi new how to ease up all the sorrow and pain. I was surprised that they included my 6th grade cuzin Chaz, to hear about his parent's plans of divorce. God is seriously working something in my uncle and auntie, and is using this damaged relationship to reveal Himself as hope. This next season of holidays, is the perfect opportunity to bring our families closer together in Christ. God is seriously showing me the importance of loving on my families and friends. Its so crazy knowing God's abundant love never ceases to pour out on this broken, dark, and fallen world. Even through all the bad, God's love prevails. Whether times are good or bad, happy or sad, God is always! Always, so wonderful, so faithful, so admirable, so majestic, so glorious, so infinite, so sovereign, so amazing, so comforting, so perfect, so everything! Now its our job to go n share Him!

Stir it up in our hearts, Lord

Lately ive been contemplating why does God allow us to fall away? How come we cant stay super close to Him all the time? How come some days we are filled with the spirit, and other days we arnt so much? Why does he allow us to be tempted, and jus not let us sin anymore? Its because this shows our weakness. This shows how deprived we are without Him. If we didnt struggle with anything and had no problems, we'd be perfect, and therefore wouldnt need God. He continues to show us, that we are only but mere men, and that we really really do need Him.

So i had a really lazy and unproductive day. I didnt get anything done in the day, when i could have went surfing, exercised, finished school work, or met up with some people. But i was too lazy, and wasted a day. So while i was lying on the ground like a lazy sloth. i was told to go run. And no1 likes running.. so as i began running around my neighborhood i got to stare at the vast night sky, which never ceases to amaze me, oh and i also got to bark with some dogs, lol, But yah, anyways.. i was pondering "Why cant we always stay super close to God?" and as i was running up this hill, it kept getting steeper, and at each corner it looked longer, higher and impossible to continue. I started to huff and puff, (no i didnt blow a house down) but i got extremely exhausted. I wanted to quit running. I wanted to stop. I couldnt do it anymore. But then, i kept looking towards the goal, which was the top end of the street. My heart was out of energy, and i wanted to collapse, but something kept telling me to go on. At that point, i realized that although i was pooped out, I still wanted to finish the run without stopping. And it was then i saw how desperate i was to reach that last street light pole. Then this sudden rush of power n strength kicked in, and i was able to finish.

This run symbolizes our "run" with God. Yes we do hafta stop sometimes, because we're running on our own energy, and not filled with God's Spirit. We get burnt out when we begin to rely on ourselves. Sometimes our lives get so busy, we forget to fill up on God. We forget how important it is to spend time in His word, soak up in His spirit, and meditate in prayer. Often times we try to make it on our own, only to realize that we arnt strong enough. We do everything possible to make it on our own, and use every effort to climb up to God, and then we realize we cant do it by ourselves. And i learned that, God comes down upon us, when we are most desperate seeking Him. Thats when God kicks in the nitro and takes over. Instead of being self controlled, its better to be God controlled.

He doesnt like it when His sheep run astray, but allows them to go take their own path. The prodigal son can never outrun the grace of the Father. Once the sheep gets lost, scared, empty, deprived, and desperate for rescue, then God comes and shepherds us back. In the same way a man rejoices when he finds his lost coin, so does God rejoice when we come back to Him. We have gone and spent our inheritance, we are left with nothing, and then we see how much we really do need God. And God forgives us, bringing us back, and clothing us with His almighty love.

It really has been a battle for me lately. I was caught fighting temptations and distractions unguarded. I forgot to equip myself with God's holy armor. I actually sensed a few spiritual battles, and it felt really weird. Even some friends at epic said they felt something was up. But yeah, I fell into laziness big time. My physical, mental, spiritual life got weak. I got super sick, and drifted away from the fruits of the spirit. I lost intimacy. I didnt make time to spend time with Him. I didnt extremely desire, or seek Him. I honestly wasn't desperate enough for Him.

Yes hanging out with cool christian kids helps, but i cant rely on my friends for God. I cant rely on my church or pastors to stir up my heart. although they can encourage us. The only one we should completely rely on is God Himself. We find Him only through faith, repentance, prayer, His word, and most especially His love. We need to focus only on Him. Boast only on the cross. So that our lives would reflect Him and that we would glorify and worship Him in every little thing we do. We need to be drunk and addicted on God!

In order to stay close to God, we must continue to humble ourselves and die to ourselves. We need to be weak so God can be strong, and we need to be little so that God can be BIG. We need to change our minds, kill our pride n lustful desires. We can't ever think we're doing enough, or we're close enough. We need to constantly ask ourselves, What can i do to improve? What am i struggling with? What's getting in the way? What's pulling me back most? How can i take one step closer to God? How can i spend more time with Him? How can i be more intimate in my relationship with Him? What are my priorities? What do I want to stand for? What do i value most? What is God's will? This is sanctification, in which we should never stop doing.

Dear God,
Thank you for your amazing love! Thank you sending your Son to die for our sins. Thank you for life. Thank you for blessing us with such wonderful creation. Thank you for breathing into me your Holy Spirit. Help us to be grateful. Help us to see you. Be in our thoughts and dreams. Teach us your ways. Thank you for always taking us back, and forgiving us of all our wrongs. You are so great Lord, that whenever we start to drift away, you pull us right back. How great is your love oh Lord! You are everything that is good. You reign over heaven and earth. You are truly amazing. We are absolutely nothing without you oh God. We are so desperate for you. We proclaim you as ruler and king of our lives. Take my life oh Lord. Take everything that i am. I no longer want to live for myself. Destroy my sinful ways. Continue to stir up new life in our hearts. Direct us onto paths of righteousness. May we not seek to please ourselves, or please others, but help us to please only you. Its all about you oh God. It's all about your crazy love. Your love covers a multitude of our sins. Let us walk in your love. Let us be clothed with your love. Let us sing of ur everlasting love. Help us when we fall, Help us when our faith or spirit grows weak. Help us to desire you more, so we can spend more time with you. I pray for those who dont yet know you. Open their eyes, show them your glory. Heal our land, bring revival, reformation and awakening. Lord i pray that more and more would come to you. Break hardened hearts, transform lives, and pour out your love on this planet. That every knee would bow, and praise you! Let us find rest, peace and joy in you oh Lord. Lord hear our prayers! We are so desperate and hungry for you God!! I love you Lord, you are so good! Amen!

"Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." -Ps 73:25-26

"He will keep you strong to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful." -1Cor 1:8

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. Do not put out the Spirit's fire; do not treat prophecies with contempt. Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid every kind of evil. May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it." -1 Thes 5:16-24

The Battle

As a young child begins to walk, he or she will constantly stumble and fall. We try so hard to walk on our own. We need a parent or someone to help guide and support us, teaching us to take one step after another. In the same way, we need to rely on God's hand to direct, teach, guide, and support us. Our Father loves us, and tells us to look out for sharp dangerous table corners. He holds us up so that we dont trip over the small things. But when we slowly drift away from Him, thinking we can walk on our own two feet, thats when the falls hurt the most. We fall down, cry in anger and pain, get upset at ourselves, upset at the world, upset that we arnt moving forward. So we try to pick ourselves up, and stumble again, realizing that we really can't do it on our own. So then what do we do? We finally cry and reach out our hands, begging for God to pick us back up. And the amazing thing, is that He is always there ready for us to turn to Him. He then dusts off the filth, cleans our tears, and calms us with His words of love. "Don't worry, I got ya. It's okay, I'm right here. It's gonna be alright. Trust me. I'll take care of you." Wow, how great of a Heavenly Father do we have, that He would always pick up the broken pieces. This is the Father we need to run to with everything, because He knows best. We need to run to Him in desire, just wanting more and more of Him.

Why am i talking about the lows and highs in our relationship with God? Because lately i fell down, and didnt know how to get back up. I got caught up in myself. Caught up in others. Caught up in the world. Caught up in prideful sin, thinking i could walk on my own. I was running on my own fuel, and my spirit started to fade weak. The truth is that i lost sight of intimacy with Him. I had a hard time spending time with Him. I didnt make time for it, I was too lazy, too distracted. I lacked so much intimate prayer. I did things to get by, and didnt focus on Him. When i tried to pray, i either fell asleep, got distracted in thoughts, or thought of how to pray in public. I thought of right words to say, and how to be a people pleaser. When God is the only one we should seek to please. I guess my head got a little big, and i got in my own way of God. I got concerned about my own image, about what people think, and basically got full in myself. Sure i could say nice prayers, speak theology, quote verses, sing worship songs, be humble to others, and do the christian religion walk. But for quite awhile, I lost my reliance on God. I lost that extreme intimacy with Him. I forgot that i cant live without Him, that He breathed in me eternal life, and that i need to make my will and desires that of His. I forgot how worthless, meaningless, hopeless, and lost we would all be without Him. Love, Life, and Light are only found within Him.

Our Thoughts, need to be focused on Him, because thoughts lead to acts, acts into habits, habits into character. If our thoughts are lustful on other things, we will lose sight of Him. How then can i control my thoughts?? It seems our minds, automatically think thoughts of pride, lust, greed, power, hate, self gain, and are focused on building up ourselves, or feeding our own desires. Sin has corrupted our minds. We cant help but categorize, stereotype, and make judgments about people. God needs to reign in our thoughts. Because if satan gains control of our thoughts, our flesh and spirit will have to battle it out. If ur mind tells u left, and ur spirit tells u right, you're definitely gonna experience some internal conflicts. The bottom line is that we need to love what God loves, and hate what God hates. We need to set our minds and desires on Him.

Ive found an awesome accountability partner. His name is Dean. i really admire his integrity and honesty. I can see the Holy Spirit work through him. he's never afraid to pray or ask God for help. We have long talks about our struggles, ways of how to equip ourselves to fight temptation, what works, and what doesnt. We have a long list of common problems, and it really does help to talk things out, and renew our minds. Im really working on sanctifying all areas of my life. And it really isnt easy, changing our behaviors and character for the better. How can we die to ourselves? How can we cut and rid ourselves of our sinful nature? We cant be perfect, but we can strive towards holiness, purity, righteousness and lives that shine Jesus. Sanctification is cleaning and repenting so that we don't just fall right back into our old selves. Dean really has been building me up in a lot of ways, and not just helping me to remember a bunch of bible verses, lol. Ultimately we need to come to God with our sins. But it really does help having someone we can confess to, support, learn, and pray with. We figure out ways we can deny ourselves, kill off and stop sins, live by the spirit and continue to grow in Christ.


"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ." - Phil 3:7-8

i have choke more to talk about, (relationships, children, books, bottling up my thoughts, Epic, the upcoming conferences) so ill finish it up later, but for now, im super zonked out, so ima gonna go crash. zzzz..