28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
-Isaiah 40:28-31
God i feel tired, weary and weak. Renew my strength..
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Choices
I know what i should do..
Go to school and stay awake
Catch up and study your hebrew
Get your papers and projects done
Go to sleep early
Eat healthier
Go to the gym
Do chores, cleaning, errands, etc
Call my family/friends and pray for them
Spend more time being present with God
But here's what i've been doing..
Skipping class
Not doing homework
Sleeping at 3-4am
Eating too much junk food
Video games, video games, video games
Internet, facebook, youtube, email, tumblr, hulu, 9gag, blogging, repeat
Burning CDs
Watching movies
Taking lazy naps
Chasing after idols to fill me rather than God
God please help me
Go to school and stay awake
Catch up and study your hebrew
Get your papers and projects done
Go to sleep early
Eat healthier
Go to the gym
Do chores, cleaning, errands, etc
Call my family/friends and pray for them
Spend more time being present with God
But here's what i've been doing..
Skipping class
Not doing homework
Sleeping at 3-4am
Eating too much junk food
Video games, video games, video games
Internet, facebook, youtube, email, tumblr, hulu, 9gag, blogging, repeat
Burning CDs
Watching movies
Taking lazy naps
Chasing after idols to fill me rather than God
God please help me
Saturday, October 27, 2012
self-talk
Sometimes i don't get it. sometimes i feel so weak. You say you love God. That yes, God is most important. but then why don't you live like he is? Why is it so hard to be patient. To wait, to sit, and to be with God. it really is simple. But yet your anxious heart runs violently after self-destroying idols. They do not satisfy your deepest desire. Yeah they might cure your present ache temporarily. But these cravings and lusts won't fulfill the deep longings that your soul really thirsts.
chris sometimes you rely too much on yourself. Rely and trust in God. God always comes through with what's best, even when it doesn't seem like it. God disciplines those he loves. God is patient and merciful. Hear Him call. Hear Him speak. He's drawing you to Himself. Quiet your soul. Empty yourself and fill yourself with Him. In Him there is nothing but light. He is full of love and peace. He doesn't accuse nor condemn. He delights in you. See yourself the way He sees you. Remain in Him.
“Be still, and know that I am God" -Psalm 42:6
Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” -John 4:13-14 In peace I will lie down and sleep,
for you alone, LORD,
make me dwell in safety. -Psalm 4:8
“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. -Matt 11:28
God,
make me the person you want me to be. transform and change my heart, renew my spirit. im lost without you. humble me, and diffuse my negative talk. I want to come back to a heart of worship. Help me to love. help me to find rest in you. consume me, break me, mold, and shape me. So often i feel empty and tired. Fill me and be my strength. Strengthen me and use me to bless and serve others. Fill me with joy once again. Fill me with a burning desire. Help me to move my faith into action. And to draw from your well. You are the one who replenishes me. You are a God who heals, delivers and restores. Be my shield in the midst of pain, suffering or hurt. Remind me that you are always near. Whisper your loving kindness. Fill me with the presence of your Spirit. Help me to be more disciplined and to use my time more wisely. Also please help me to pray for others. May you receive all the glory and may your will be done. Amen,
chris sometimes you rely too much on yourself. Rely and trust in God. God always comes through with what's best, even when it doesn't seem like it. God disciplines those he loves. God is patient and merciful. Hear Him call. Hear Him speak. He's drawing you to Himself. Quiet your soul. Empty yourself and fill yourself with Him. In Him there is nothing but light. He is full of love and peace. He doesn't accuse nor condemn. He delights in you. See yourself the way He sees you. Remain in Him.
“Be still, and know that I am God" -Psalm 42:6
Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” -John 4:13-14 In peace I will lie down and sleep,
for you alone, LORD,
make me dwell in safety. -Psalm 4:8
“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. -Matt 11:28
God,
make me the person you want me to be. transform and change my heart, renew my spirit. im lost without you. humble me, and diffuse my negative talk. I want to come back to a heart of worship. Help me to love. help me to find rest in you. consume me, break me, mold, and shape me. So often i feel empty and tired. Fill me and be my strength. Strengthen me and use me to bless and serve others. Fill me with joy once again. Fill me with a burning desire. Help me to move my faith into action. And to draw from your well. You are the one who replenishes me. You are a God who heals, delivers and restores. Be my shield in the midst of pain, suffering or hurt. Remind me that you are always near. Whisper your loving kindness. Fill me with the presence of your Spirit. Help me to be more disciplined and to use my time more wisely. Also please help me to pray for others. May you receive all the glory and may your will be done. Amen,
Thursday, October 25, 2012
The Lazy Bug
so what do i do? i blog about how lazy ive been. Even though i didn't get any work done, and the day is almost over.. i did make progress in video games, lol. that's not something i should be proud of. hours jus seem to fly by. Then there's a wind of "i should get something done!" so i get off the couch and use the bathroom, and come back to the couch and fall into a cycle of drowsiness. i blame the internet, media and entertainment. But really it's jus a lack of willpower, motivation and self discipline. Analyzing problems and not making any moves of action, still leaves me with the same problem. why am i complaining, when ppl are buy at work or have demanding things to do?
i need to go gym. it's hard to get myself there if i go alone
Step 1) Pray to God for help
Step 2) Wake up! Get off the couch bro, roll off if u hafta
Step 3) Get off the stinkin computer, no utube wont help!
Step 4) no seriously.. really get off the computer
Step 5) go get C4 preworkout for energy
Step 6) no chris, don't go back to the couch!
Step 7) kill your excuses and put some socks on man
Step 8) brush your teeth
Step 9) listen to loud music, "preliator by globus"
Step 10)Pack your bag and get out the door
hard work, dedication, sacrifice, focus
do whatever it takes to motivate yourself. Vision + Intent.
Push yourself!
u can do it! now go!!!
My dad once said.. no one is lazy becomes successful
_________
came back from the gym
i forget how happy the gym makes me
it's fun lifting heavy weights and pushing yourself beyond limits
i did this cycle class, and it was intense. i could barely walk after
i need to be more consistent with the gym
idk what it is about exercising that rejuvenates me and makes me feel alive
the key is staying motivated and disciplined
but sometimes it's so hard to get there, lol
accountability and a gym partner really help and make it more fun
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
RISE
this blog was never meant to be a place where i jus vent about problems. I wanted my blog to be about God. I wanted it to be uplifting and encouraging. And not filled complaints or negativity. I've been trying so hard to hold my tongue on any negative thoughts. But the fact is, life has many obstacles to overcome. Trials make us stronger. Suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character; and character, hope. So when life gets hard, look up and put your hope in God! Overcoming difficulties requires us to rise to the challenge and to mature. More importantly, we're given the choice to either face our problems on our own, or to trust God in the midst of them. God also surrounds us with the body of the church so we can lend and receive support from others. Regardless of how big or small your problems are, God cares about all the things we struggle with. And by walking with him, he begins a growing process of change, discipline, and sanctification.
Some random thoughts, and me battling my bad habits
1) My stomach is driving me nuts. It's obvious it's another ulcerative colitus flare up. But i'm too stubborn to go to the doctor. The pills i'm taking now are slowly helping. And i read on peptobismo that you're not supposed to take if u have ulcers.. so i was like.. oops.. do i bear out the pain till it goes away? or go through the hassle of doctor appointments? lol i'm choosing to bear it out..
2) I need to get my life organized. It's hard to break old habits. Sleeping super late affects my next day. I need to sleep earlier and eat healthier.
3) I need to clean my room. i kinda get tired of cleaning, and things become messy fast. I need to do laundry.
4) I need to start working out harder and more consistently. Being away from the gym makes me feel sluggish and lazy. gah so hard to make it to the gym on my own
4.5) i worry and think too much
5) This should've been number 1 on the list, but i want to deepen in my walk with God. And this takes devoting time. This takes practicing spiritual disciplines in secret and in quiet places. I feel like i've lost that sense of just being with God. I need to stop occupying myself with other things.
6) I skipped class today again. i coulda made it on time, but i felt so tired, so i slept in. Yesterday i felt so behind in hebrew. I'm on chapter 8 and the teacher is discussing chapter 10. I pull out all the vocabulary flash cards i haven't looked at and it's a buttload. Studying hebrew is like placing yourself in an empty swimming pool, then filling it with mud, quicksand, barf, lava, monkey poop, a hebrew dictionary, and a black hole. but then later i felt better because everyone said after the last test, people stopped studying too. And the prof hasn't given any quizzes lately, so everyone else feels behind too. I also read through the book, and got some hw done.. it's not so bad once it clicks.
7) Oh this is a random thought. but i started watching this show called "Walking Dead." It's a zombie survival show.. u guys probably wouldn't like it, unless you like zombies. but the show is kinda creepy, that i keep thinking what if zombies really do exist and want to eat me. Shows on hulu are also distracting, tv, entertainment and video games sucks all my time. Control ur limits chris!
8) i've been having a bunch of dreams. A giant gorilla was chasing me. i wish i remembered more of my dreams. lol, i do remember i drove my car through a burgerking.
9) it's kinda sad i need to leave church soon. i'm gonna miss everyone. :( i wanted to do somethin fun for church this friday and also hallelujah night. but i really don't have any ideas. If you guys have any fun ideas please help me!!
10) i like chicken
11) i'm kinda excited to go watch a movie tonight. Probably End of Watch
12) im wasting my time blogging.. lol
12.5) i miss hawaii.. i should call my parents
13) i want to see a chiropractor, but it's so much $! but my back hurts! ahh
14) i'm addicted to minecraft and pokemon. it's becoming a problem
15) if u got this far, u minus well pray for me! thanks!
Some random thoughts, and me battling my bad habits
1) My stomach is driving me nuts. It's obvious it's another ulcerative colitus flare up. But i'm too stubborn to go to the doctor. The pills i'm taking now are slowly helping. And i read on peptobismo that you're not supposed to take if u have ulcers.. so i was like.. oops.. do i bear out the pain till it goes away? or go through the hassle of doctor appointments? lol i'm choosing to bear it out..
2) I need to get my life organized. It's hard to break old habits. Sleeping super late affects my next day. I need to sleep earlier and eat healthier.
3) I need to clean my room. i kinda get tired of cleaning, and things become messy fast. I need to do laundry.
4) I need to start working out harder and more consistently. Being away from the gym makes me feel sluggish and lazy. gah so hard to make it to the gym on my own
4.5) i worry and think too much
5) This should've been number 1 on the list, but i want to deepen in my walk with God. And this takes devoting time. This takes practicing spiritual disciplines in secret and in quiet places. I feel like i've lost that sense of just being with God. I need to stop occupying myself with other things.
6) I skipped class today again. i coulda made it on time, but i felt so tired, so i slept in. Yesterday i felt so behind in hebrew. I'm on chapter 8 and the teacher is discussing chapter 10. I pull out all the vocabulary flash cards i haven't looked at and it's a buttload. Studying hebrew is like placing yourself in an empty swimming pool, then filling it with mud, quicksand, barf, lava, monkey poop, a hebrew dictionary, and a black hole. but then later i felt better because everyone said after the last test, people stopped studying too. And the prof hasn't given any quizzes lately, so everyone else feels behind too. I also read through the book, and got some hw done.. it's not so bad once it clicks.
7) Oh this is a random thought. but i started watching this show called "Walking Dead." It's a zombie survival show.. u guys probably wouldn't like it, unless you like zombies. but the show is kinda creepy, that i keep thinking what if zombies really do exist and want to eat me. Shows on hulu are also distracting, tv, entertainment and video games sucks all my time. Control ur limits chris!
8) i've been having a bunch of dreams. A giant gorilla was chasing me. i wish i remembered more of my dreams. lol, i do remember i drove my car through a burgerking.
9) it's kinda sad i need to leave church soon. i'm gonna miss everyone. :( i wanted to do somethin fun for church this friday and also hallelujah night. but i really don't have any ideas. If you guys have any fun ideas please help me!!
10) i like chicken
11) i'm kinda excited to go watch a movie tonight. Probably End of Watch
12) im wasting my time blogging.. lol
12.5) i miss hawaii.. i should call my parents
13) i want to see a chiropractor, but it's so much $! but my back hurts! ahh
14) i'm addicted to minecraft and pokemon. it's becoming a problem
15) if u got this far, u minus well pray for me! thanks!
Living Faith
This last weeks sermon was really meant for me. i need to put my faith in Action. It's easy to talk about God and think about God, but do i really practice what i preach? Does God rule and reign in my decisions and actions? James argues that faith without works is dead. it's useless. What good is it if salt looses it's saltiness? What good is it to hide your light? A good tree must bear good fruit. This is the evidence of our faith.
James 1:22
Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. We're not called to be hearers, but doers.
16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. 17 If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? 18 Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. -1 john 3:16-19
There should be a day and night contrast between a spirit filled christian and a non-believer. It should be obvious. Christians have God within them!
However, good fruit isn't just doing good works. do we experience the fruit of the spirit? Is there a depth to our love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control?
We need to work from our overflow of rest. We need to focus on being before doing. In Acts the apostles/disciples waited to be filled with the Spirit before they were sent out. We too need to receive strength from our time with God, so we can share the love of Christ with others.
Sometimes we say we're too busy, i can't do things, i'll do it later, i don't have the time, i don't know how. We make excuses for why we're so distant and why we struggle. I know i make these excuses all the time. I think mary got it right when she simply sat before Jesus and listened to his words.
We're so consumed by trying to get everything done. Maybe we have too many responsibilities. What's hindering you from coming before God? Are we really too busy to make time for God? Or is it our hearts? Are we too worried about our future? Why must we hurry and rush everywhere? Is it really just about doing as much as we can as fast as we can? When we look at the life of Christ, he was super relaxed and chill. The spirit of God isn't anxious about anything. Sometimes we jus need to slow our roll and be with God. When we experience God, he brings us peace and stillness.
Instead of rushing around like nascars, we need to slow ourselves down. busyness is the enemy of peace. hurry is the enemy of depth. We need peace and depth in our lives. Taking care of our spiritual lives and embracing the gospel daily should be our top priority. Don't compromise by filling our schedule with activities. In the end what's truly important to you? Take care of yourself, by finding rest in God.
Find liberation in rest. It's like the first time you experienced snow. Remember how excited you were? We were simply amazed and in awe. We jus wanted to play in the snow and enjoy it. snow makes me really happy, lol. In the same way, our time with God should be like the first time we saw snow. Just sheer wonderment, joy and awe.
_______________________
Extra awesome bible verses..
Jer 32:36-41
this is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: 37 I will surely gather them from all the lands where I banish them in my furious anger and great wrath; I will bring them back to this place and let them live in safety. 38 They will be my people, and I will be their God. 39 I will give them singleness of heart and action, so that they will always fear me and that all will then go well for them and for their children after them. 40 I will make an everlasting covenant with them: I will never stop doing good to them, and I will inspire them to fear me, so that they will never turn away from me. 41 I will rejoice in doing them good and will assuredly plant them in this land with all my heart and soul.
Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. -proverbs 13:12
8 Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.
9 Fear the LORD, you his holy people,
for those who fear him lack nothing. psalm 34:8-9
James 1:22
Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. We're not called to be hearers, but doers.
16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. 17 If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? 18 Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. -1 john 3:16-19
There should be a day and night contrast between a spirit filled christian and a non-believer. It should be obvious. Christians have God within them!
However, good fruit isn't just doing good works. do we experience the fruit of the spirit? Is there a depth to our love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control?
We need to work from our overflow of rest. We need to focus on being before doing. In Acts the apostles/disciples waited to be filled with the Spirit before they were sent out. We too need to receive strength from our time with God, so we can share the love of Christ with others.
Sometimes we say we're too busy, i can't do things, i'll do it later, i don't have the time, i don't know how. We make excuses for why we're so distant and why we struggle. I know i make these excuses all the time. I think mary got it right when she simply sat before Jesus and listened to his words.
We're so consumed by trying to get everything done. Maybe we have too many responsibilities. What's hindering you from coming before God? Are we really too busy to make time for God? Or is it our hearts? Are we too worried about our future? Why must we hurry and rush everywhere? Is it really just about doing as much as we can as fast as we can? When we look at the life of Christ, he was super relaxed and chill. The spirit of God isn't anxious about anything. Sometimes we jus need to slow our roll and be with God. When we experience God, he brings us peace and stillness.
Instead of rushing around like nascars, we need to slow ourselves down. busyness is the enemy of peace. hurry is the enemy of depth. We need peace and depth in our lives. Taking care of our spiritual lives and embracing the gospel daily should be our top priority. Don't compromise by filling our schedule with activities. In the end what's truly important to you? Take care of yourself, by finding rest in God.
Find liberation in rest. It's like the first time you experienced snow. Remember how excited you were? We were simply amazed and in awe. We jus wanted to play in the snow and enjoy it. snow makes me really happy, lol. In the same way, our time with God should be like the first time we saw snow. Just sheer wonderment, joy and awe.
_______________________
Extra awesome bible verses..
Jer 32:36-41
this is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: 37 I will surely gather them from all the lands where I banish them in my furious anger and great wrath; I will bring them back to this place and let them live in safety. 38 They will be my people, and I will be their God. 39 I will give them singleness of heart and action, so that they will always fear me and that all will then go well for them and for their children after them. 40 I will make an everlasting covenant with them: I will never stop doing good to them, and I will inspire them to fear me, so that they will never turn away from me. 41 I will rejoice in doing them good and will assuredly plant them in this land with all my heart and soul.
Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. -proverbs 13:12
8 Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.
9 Fear the LORD, you his holy people,
for those who fear him lack nothing. psalm 34:8-9
Ezekiel 36:24-28
24 “‘For I will take you out of
the nations; I will gather you from all the countries and bring you back into
your own land. 25 I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will
be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. 26 I will give you a new heart
and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and
give you a heart of flesh. 27 And I will put my Spirit in you and
move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. 28
Then you will live in the land I gave your ancestors; you will be my people,
and I will be your God.1 Corinthians 1:8-9
8 He will also keep you firm to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 God is faithful, who has called you into fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.
John 6:37-40
37 All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 38 For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. 39 And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. 40 For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”
John 6:44
44 “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day.
John 6:64-65
For Jesus had known from the beginning which of them did not believe and who would betray him. 65 He went on to say, “This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless the Father has enabled them.”
John 10:27-29
37 All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 38 For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. 39 And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. 40 For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”
John 6:44
44 “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day.
John 6:64-65
For Jesus had known from the beginning which of them did not believe and who would betray him. 65 He went on to say, “This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless the Father has enabled them.”
John 10:27-29
27 My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow
me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one
will snatch them out of my hand. 29
My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch
them out of my Father’s hand.
Ephesians 1:3-14
3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. 4 For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love 5 he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— 6 to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. 7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace 8 that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, 9 he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, 10 to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.
11
In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of
him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, 12
in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for
the praise of his glory. 13 And you also were included in Christ
when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you
believed, you were marked in him with a seal,
the promised Holy Spirit, 14 who is a deposit guaranteeing our
inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to
the praise of his glory.
Monday, October 15, 2012
San Diego Weekend
I have about 1,000 thoughts just roaming in my tiny head. I guess it'd be good to blog some down so i don't have them floating around aimlessly. i sense this is gonna be a loong blog.. probably kinda boring too, if i were u i wouldnt read it
okay.. so this weekend i hadta go to a National Youth Worker Convention (NYWC) hosted by Youth Specialties (YS). Talbot gives us 3 credits for going since it pretty much sums up what the prof would have taught in the semester. They basically had a bunch of guess speakers, leadership seminars, and everything regarding youth ministry. It was actually pretty cool to see a bunch of youth pastors, leaders, and volunteers all meeting in one place.
Lemme digress. lol i really don't like it when ppl say that phrase. idk why. Anywho.. so on Thursday i drove to my aunty's house. i also picked up crispy cream doughnuts on the way.. ohh so good yet so bad. Anyways, i say anyways a lot. so yah. i got to my aunties house and we played scrabble with friends for a good hour. i was surprised that she was better than me. anyyyways.. she later talked about how she found a doctor who uses natural remedies like with herbs and stuff. I don't really kno how he does it, but he supposedly cured people with different types of cancer too. my aunty said she found that her hypoglycemia is most likely from having a virus plus mercury insider her. Anyways, even though i was super tired and wanted to sleep, i got to bond a little with my aunty and pray for her. Sometimes we have so many things we want to tend to that we often neglect opportunities to be present with others.
Anyways.. i actually booked a flight to San Diego, because everyone including my dad thought that driving with my car would be kind of a risk. She makes a lot of noise, but she can still run fine on sheer willpower and soul. After the weekend i regretted taking a flight out.
From my aunty's house, i drove to the parking lot to drop my car, took a shuttle to LAX, took a 1 hour flight to San Diego, took a shuttle to the hotel.
Hotel room was pretty sweet, i had two queen size beds to jump from. Clean sheets, air condition, fresh towels and a warm shower was awesome... until i later got the bill.. the food there was super expensive, everything was like $5 more than what it should be.
Anyways.. the worship at the conference was pretty awesome. for a moment i got a little teary because it was incredible to be in a room full of 5,000+ Christians. There was some Christian rapper and these two skit guys that were pretty funny. hmm.. One of the speakers was really funny. He's an old lawyer guy that goes after international injustices. He talked about how he thought his friend was playing a joke pretending to be a Uganda president leader guy who wanted to recruit him. But then when he got off the plane, he found out it wasn't his friend playing a prank. He was then made a diplomat counselor of Uganda. and then he said, "yeah they gave me some uganda flags to put on my car, they're so bitchin'!" lol the crowded laughed so hard that this old guy used that phrase at a Christian conference. i was surprised how many bad things some of the speakers said, but it was pretty funny. And then the old guy said, "so sue me. I could kill you! i have Uganda immunity." lol you probably woulda hadta been there.
Anyways..... i went to a Drawing Out the Secret Hurt in Teenagers seminar, Counseling 101 Seminar, Youth Group Fun and Games seminar, and Mentoring One on One seminar. There were group times when we met with the Talbot students to discuss stuff and main conference sermons too. They had a bunch of exhibit booths set up where i got free stuff. It's nice to get 3 credits outta the way, but i still hafta meet up with a cohort 3 times, and have tons of papers and projects for that class.
Doug Fields from Saddleback church is probably the most well known youth pastor out there. it was cool getting to hear him speak. He talked about the importance of not being overly busy. Sometimes pastors give, plan, and serve so much that they compromise their own walk and devotion to God.
oh i met this other youth pastor guy from hawaii, it was cool meeting him. i also got to know some other talbot guys too.
I guess the two main things i learned through this conference was that it's okay to not be so productive. It's good to make space to find rest in God. It's hard to find peace when we overload our schedules. but sometimes it cant be helped. Secondly, i learned how important it is to really invest in students and leaders. I regret not doing a better job and making more time for specific people. Make time for God, and make time for people. It's too easy to let other things get in our way of what's truly important.
Ok, so here's where it began to get frustrating. I took a shuttle back to San Diego Airport, then took a shuttle to the commuter gates, and began waiting for my flight. it's 7pm and my flight was supposed to leave at 9, and arrive at 10. Then they said, oh well the flight is delayed at won't come till 1040. So everyone continues to wait. Then later the lady says, "oh the pilot decided that he's not coming at all.." so everyone is pissed because it was the last flight before midnight, and ppl had connecting flights to get to. So there was one lady and like 40 angry ppl. i probably need to send american airlines an email for a refund.
She finally announced that a bunch of vans would drive us to lax, which is like 3 hours. And so i jumped in a little van with 6 other people. It was weird because no one talked to each other. People were tired and angry. It didn't bother me so much at first. There was this couple next to me, and they were like making out and being all gross. At least they weren't too upset. After sitting in the van so long with a bunch of angry people, it started to really affect me. i regret not driving 2-3hrs there and 2-3hrs back. Instead the entire wait, commute and travel was over 15+ hours. i was so tired. then i caught a shuttle to my car, and went to mcdonalds for ice cream. I miss working out, i ate super bad the whole week. i also spent so much money. In the end, conference was pretty good, but the traveling was miserable. Even tho all i did was sit around all weekend, it was exhausting.
right now im skipping class. i should do my hebrew hw and write a 6 pg paper, but i dont want to. im hungry
okay.. so this weekend i hadta go to a National Youth Worker Convention (NYWC) hosted by Youth Specialties (YS). Talbot gives us 3 credits for going since it pretty much sums up what the prof would have taught in the semester. They basically had a bunch of guess speakers, leadership seminars, and everything regarding youth ministry. It was actually pretty cool to see a bunch of youth pastors, leaders, and volunteers all meeting in one place.
Lemme digress. lol i really don't like it when ppl say that phrase. idk why. Anywho.. so on Thursday i drove to my aunty's house. i also picked up crispy cream doughnuts on the way.. ohh so good yet so bad. Anyways, i say anyways a lot. so yah. i got to my aunties house and we played scrabble with friends for a good hour. i was surprised that she was better than me. anyyyways.. she later talked about how she found a doctor who uses natural remedies like with herbs and stuff. I don't really kno how he does it, but he supposedly cured people with different types of cancer too. my aunty said she found that her hypoglycemia is most likely from having a virus plus mercury insider her. Anyways, even though i was super tired and wanted to sleep, i got to bond a little with my aunty and pray for her. Sometimes we have so many things we want to tend to that we often neglect opportunities to be present with others.
Anyways.. i actually booked a flight to San Diego, because everyone including my dad thought that driving with my car would be kind of a risk. She makes a lot of noise, but she can still run fine on sheer willpower and soul. After the weekend i regretted taking a flight out.
From my aunty's house, i drove to the parking lot to drop my car, took a shuttle to LAX, took a 1 hour flight to San Diego, took a shuttle to the hotel.
Hotel room was pretty sweet, i had two queen size beds to jump from. Clean sheets, air condition, fresh towels and a warm shower was awesome... until i later got the bill.. the food there was super expensive, everything was like $5 more than what it should be.
Anyways.. the worship at the conference was pretty awesome. for a moment i got a little teary because it was incredible to be in a room full of 5,000+ Christians. There was some Christian rapper and these two skit guys that were pretty funny. hmm.. One of the speakers was really funny. He's an old lawyer guy that goes after international injustices. He talked about how he thought his friend was playing a joke pretending to be a Uganda president leader guy who wanted to recruit him. But then when he got off the plane, he found out it wasn't his friend playing a prank. He was then made a diplomat counselor of Uganda. and then he said, "yeah they gave me some uganda flags to put on my car, they're so bitchin'!" lol the crowded laughed so hard that this old guy used that phrase at a Christian conference. i was surprised how many bad things some of the speakers said, but it was pretty funny. And then the old guy said, "so sue me. I could kill you! i have Uganda immunity." lol you probably woulda hadta been there.
Anyways..... i went to a Drawing Out the Secret Hurt in Teenagers seminar, Counseling 101 Seminar, Youth Group Fun and Games seminar, and Mentoring One on One seminar. There were group times when we met with the Talbot students to discuss stuff and main conference sermons too. They had a bunch of exhibit booths set up where i got free stuff. It's nice to get 3 credits outta the way, but i still hafta meet up with a cohort 3 times, and have tons of papers and projects for that class.
Doug Fields from Saddleback church is probably the most well known youth pastor out there. it was cool getting to hear him speak. He talked about the importance of not being overly busy. Sometimes pastors give, plan, and serve so much that they compromise their own walk and devotion to God.
oh i met this other youth pastor guy from hawaii, it was cool meeting him. i also got to know some other talbot guys too.
I guess the two main things i learned through this conference was that it's okay to not be so productive. It's good to make space to find rest in God. It's hard to find peace when we overload our schedules. but sometimes it cant be helped. Secondly, i learned how important it is to really invest in students and leaders. I regret not doing a better job and making more time for specific people. Make time for God, and make time for people. It's too easy to let other things get in our way of what's truly important.
Ok, so here's where it began to get frustrating. I took a shuttle back to San Diego Airport, then took a shuttle to the commuter gates, and began waiting for my flight. it's 7pm and my flight was supposed to leave at 9, and arrive at 10. Then they said, oh well the flight is delayed at won't come till 1040. So everyone continues to wait. Then later the lady says, "oh the pilot decided that he's not coming at all.." so everyone is pissed because it was the last flight before midnight, and ppl had connecting flights to get to. So there was one lady and like 40 angry ppl. i probably need to send american airlines an email for a refund.
She finally announced that a bunch of vans would drive us to lax, which is like 3 hours. And so i jumped in a little van with 6 other people. It was weird because no one talked to each other. People were tired and angry. It didn't bother me so much at first. There was this couple next to me, and they were like making out and being all gross. At least they weren't too upset. After sitting in the van so long with a bunch of angry people, it started to really affect me. i regret not driving 2-3hrs there and 2-3hrs back. Instead the entire wait, commute and travel was over 15+ hours. i was so tired. then i caught a shuttle to my car, and went to mcdonalds for ice cream. I miss working out, i ate super bad the whole week. i also spent so much money. In the end, conference was pretty good, but the traveling was miserable. Even tho all i did was sit around all weekend, it was exhausting.
right now im skipping class. i should do my hebrew hw and write a 6 pg paper, but i dont want to. im hungry
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Soul Care
Hello blog,
I was up till 5am studying for hebrew. So much stress tryin to study for one test. The test was pretty hard, but i felt like i understood all the concepts. i jus wish i studied the vocab better. it was kinda challenging cuz we had to write out and translate the english into hebrew.. guhhh why! I could understand needing greek n hebrew if there were no english translations.. but we already have translations so why!!
anywho.. today i found out we have torry conference next week. Really it jus gives me next wednesday off. but i kinda wanna skip monday and/or tuesday. my goals have become to jus pass.
im really thirsty... today i went to cvs.. and u wouldnt believe how many snacks, candy and junk food i bought.. im always so tight w/money and hate compromising my diet with junk food. but i needed a little splurge.
I find myself having to go pee like every 15 minutes! gah.. it's crazy how many more times in my life i hafta do laundry, use the bathroom, brush my teeth. i need a clone or robot to do everything for me
so i titled this blog "Soul Care" because i think we all need to take care of our souls. We take care of ourselves to an extent, but sometimes we overwork ourselves and push ourselves to get so many things done. And usually the thing that gets sacrificed is rest and time with God. I've been having stomach attacks daily for two weeks. it's probably ulcerative colitus again, but i really dont wanna hafta go to the doctor and do a bunch of test. Anyways, during a time of suffering, i think it helped me depend on God. Sometimes God allows trials, challenges, and even pain to get our attention.
Instead of tryin to figure out and do everythin on our own, we need to come to God in prayer. I actually prayed out loud, which kept my focus better. My thoughts are usually so scattered. sometimes writing it out helps too.
Instead of trying to manage our time and schedules, we need to manage ourselves. What's most important? Are we compromising our devotion to God? It's easy to say, "Oh yah, God is first." But do our actions and lifestyle really mimic what we confess? When we really think about it, we have a lot of idols, addictions, and other things that consume our thoughts more than God. One of my friends posted on their fb, "God i want to know your heart. I want to denounce mine and know your heart." When we desire God we desire His will. When we see God, we just want to be with Him and stand in awe. We must not forget the explosive and relentless love of our God.
If you feel like you haven't experienced Him in awhile, you may want to ask, "where have i been? have i really been seeking Him with all my heart, with all my soul and with all my strength?" I struggle to make space for God. I struggle to sit in silence, slow down, listen, wait, and receive. I honestly jus spent 5 minutes with God, and it felt so intimate. He reaffirms us, he listens to all our complaints, worries and fears. He carries and lifts our burdens. we simply need to surrender and trust in faith. i think worship music really helps me focus and makes it easier to come before God.
I kinda relearned something about myself today. If i have the option of being independent or dependent, i almost always rather be dependent. I enjoy doing activities and things with other people more than jus tryin to do them alone. I guess that's most people. but.. i guess what i'm tryin to say is.. if no1 is around, i can be very independent. but if there is someone i can turn to, i rather rely on them. I know i have a hard time asking people for help, but honestly that's what christian brothers and sisters are for. I need to strengthen my support group, and also be there for others.. We should rely and turn to our church family for help. How often do we really pray for others, or ask others for prayer? Tryin to get through life alone is jus too hard. We need to find people who we can trust. People who can invest into us and be supportive. And i guess it really starts by being there for others and offering compassion. God's love flows through us so we have the power to minister with His love. stay connected to the vine, and find other branches who can support you.
I was up till 5am studying for hebrew. So much stress tryin to study for one test. The test was pretty hard, but i felt like i understood all the concepts. i jus wish i studied the vocab better. it was kinda challenging cuz we had to write out and translate the english into hebrew.. guhhh why! I could understand needing greek n hebrew if there were no english translations.. but we already have translations so why!!
anywho.. today i found out we have torry conference next week. Really it jus gives me next wednesday off. but i kinda wanna skip monday and/or tuesday. my goals have become to jus pass.
im really thirsty... today i went to cvs.. and u wouldnt believe how many snacks, candy and junk food i bought.. im always so tight w/money and hate compromising my diet with junk food. but i needed a little splurge.
I find myself having to go pee like every 15 minutes! gah.. it's crazy how many more times in my life i hafta do laundry, use the bathroom, brush my teeth. i need a clone or robot to do everything for me
so i titled this blog "Soul Care" because i think we all need to take care of our souls. We take care of ourselves to an extent, but sometimes we overwork ourselves and push ourselves to get so many things done. And usually the thing that gets sacrificed is rest and time with God. I've been having stomach attacks daily for two weeks. it's probably ulcerative colitus again, but i really dont wanna hafta go to the doctor and do a bunch of test. Anyways, during a time of suffering, i think it helped me depend on God. Sometimes God allows trials, challenges, and even pain to get our attention.
Instead of tryin to figure out and do everythin on our own, we need to come to God in prayer. I actually prayed out loud, which kept my focus better. My thoughts are usually so scattered. sometimes writing it out helps too.
Instead of trying to manage our time and schedules, we need to manage ourselves. What's most important? Are we compromising our devotion to God? It's easy to say, "Oh yah, God is first." But do our actions and lifestyle really mimic what we confess? When we really think about it, we have a lot of idols, addictions, and other things that consume our thoughts more than God. One of my friends posted on their fb, "God i want to know your heart. I want to denounce mine and know your heart." When we desire God we desire His will. When we see God, we just want to be with Him and stand in awe. We must not forget the explosive and relentless love of our God.
If you feel like you haven't experienced Him in awhile, you may want to ask, "where have i been? have i really been seeking Him with all my heart, with all my soul and with all my strength?" I struggle to make space for God. I struggle to sit in silence, slow down, listen, wait, and receive. I honestly jus spent 5 minutes with God, and it felt so intimate. He reaffirms us, he listens to all our complaints, worries and fears. He carries and lifts our burdens. we simply need to surrender and trust in faith. i think worship music really helps me focus and makes it easier to come before God.
I kinda relearned something about myself today. If i have the option of being independent or dependent, i almost always rather be dependent. I enjoy doing activities and things with other people more than jus tryin to do them alone. I guess that's most people. but.. i guess what i'm tryin to say is.. if no1 is around, i can be very independent. but if there is someone i can turn to, i rather rely on them. I know i have a hard time asking people for help, but honestly that's what christian brothers and sisters are for. I need to strengthen my support group, and also be there for others.. We should rely and turn to our church family for help. How often do we really pray for others, or ask others for prayer? Tryin to get through life alone is jus too hard. We need to find people who we can trust. People who can invest into us and be supportive. And i guess it really starts by being there for others and offering compassion. God's love flows through us so we have the power to minister with His love. stay connected to the vine, and find other branches who can support you.
Friday, October 5, 2012
1234567890
i dont like when internet is slow
im so habituated to hit a light switch, even when it's already off or on.
like i turn the lights on before leaving the bathroom,
or i turn off the lights walkin into the living room
i use my hand as a napkin for everything
when someone brings up a noun.. i started saying the phrase..
"well you know what they say about _______"
even if it doesn't make sense
if somethin requires too much work i say "ho brah so sweaty"
i have no idea what this blog is about
i really want a cheeseburger and fries.. oh minus well have some mcdonalds ice cream too
i was on tumblr.. and it jus makes me hungry and miss hawaii
i miss surfing and not worrying about anything
i need to be on True Life: I'm Addicted to Minecraft
it's all i think about now days.. fight zombies, build houses, mine for gold, tame pets.. ahh!
u guys who know me well, know that i am a pokemon master..
and well, even if the game is for 10yr olds.. a new pokemon comes out on Sunday and im excited
video games will probably keep me single for awhile..
This week i noticed a heightened value for accountability. It's honestly rare to find someone who will really be accountable for your spiritual, mental, emotional, social, and physical life. i can barely do anything on my own. self disciplinary is hard. i wish i could jus pay someone to do my hw.. books papers test.. and then san diego for a youth ministry conference.
We need community and the church to be united. too many ppl struggle with loneliness and depression. And it's because people have lacked the compassion to reach out to others, plus were so individualistic, we try to tackle the whole world on our own. we need accountability to pray and encourage one another. We all have things to share, but sometimes we jus dont have anyone to share it with, so we fb status it, tweet or instagram. We're honestly jus lookin for people to care and to be involved in our busy lives. it's so easy to withdraw and keep all our thoughts to ourselves. i need to learn to express myself more, listen to others more, pray more, and focus on accountability. i also need to study more.. gah
oh yah.. so back to needed community.. in my counseling class so far.. 5-6 ppl have cried.. i got teary when it was my turn.. sometimes we asian ppl bottle up our emotions and feelings to much. i need to learn that it's okay to be vulnerable with people you trust. i actually cried today.. wow admitting that sounds so girly.. and then i blog about it? and then someone said they were about to hug me cuz they thought i was some girl, and then someone else called me a girl too. man.. i need to stop being so girly, lol.. now that i think about it.. i dont have many bros who blog.. i should go fight a bear, well.. i'd probably die
the last two times i cried over the years have been because i havnt been a good son. i wish i were there for my mom and more patient. i dont seem to have the patience to listen and call her sometimes.. I also need to talk to my dad more.. living in cali has actually put a lot of strain on my family relationships and friends..
im so habituated to hit a light switch, even when it's already off or on.
like i turn the lights on before leaving the bathroom,
or i turn off the lights walkin into the living room
i use my hand as a napkin for everything
when someone brings up a noun.. i started saying the phrase..
"well you know what they say about _______"
even if it doesn't make sense
if somethin requires too much work i say "ho brah so sweaty"
i have no idea what this blog is about
i really want a cheeseburger and fries.. oh minus well have some mcdonalds ice cream too
i was on tumblr.. and it jus makes me hungry and miss hawaii
i miss surfing and not worrying about anything
i need to be on True Life: I'm Addicted to Minecraft
it's all i think about now days.. fight zombies, build houses, mine for gold, tame pets.. ahh!
u guys who know me well, know that i am a pokemon master..
and well, even if the game is for 10yr olds.. a new pokemon comes out on Sunday and im excited
video games will probably keep me single for awhile..
This week i noticed a heightened value for accountability. It's honestly rare to find someone who will really be accountable for your spiritual, mental, emotional, social, and physical life. i can barely do anything on my own. self disciplinary is hard. i wish i could jus pay someone to do my hw.. books papers test.. and then san diego for a youth ministry conference.
We need community and the church to be united. too many ppl struggle with loneliness and depression. And it's because people have lacked the compassion to reach out to others, plus were so individualistic, we try to tackle the whole world on our own. we need accountability to pray and encourage one another. We all have things to share, but sometimes we jus dont have anyone to share it with, so we fb status it, tweet or instagram. We're honestly jus lookin for people to care and to be involved in our busy lives. it's so easy to withdraw and keep all our thoughts to ourselves. i need to learn to express myself more, listen to others more, pray more, and focus on accountability. i also need to study more.. gah
oh yah.. so back to needed community.. in my counseling class so far.. 5-6 ppl have cried.. i got teary when it was my turn.. sometimes we asian ppl bottle up our emotions and feelings to much. i need to learn that it's okay to be vulnerable with people you trust. i actually cried today.. wow admitting that sounds so girly.. and then i blog about it? and then someone said they were about to hug me cuz they thought i was some girl, and then someone else called me a girl too. man.. i need to stop being so girly, lol.. now that i think about it.. i dont have many bros who blog.. i should go fight a bear, well.. i'd probably die
the last two times i cried over the years have been because i havnt been a good son. i wish i were there for my mom and more patient. i dont seem to have the patience to listen and call her sometimes.. I also need to talk to my dad more.. living in cali has actually put a lot of strain on my family relationships and friends..
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