The Beauty of Stars

i found myself taking out a bag of trash just now around midnight. I stopped for a second. My neighborhood was completely quiet and peaceful. Usually there's cars going by or a dog barking or something. The air felt crisp and calm, almost too peaceful if that's possible. I caught myself looking up at the dark night sky and realized how many shining stars there were. I stopped in sheer amazement, wonder and awe. With my neck bent upward i found myself searching the whole sky to take a glimpse at all these tiny stars. Some twinkled, some were brighter. It's as if angels were looking down smiling. I wanted to just lay down in the grass and sleep under the stars in my pajamas. But no.. the grass would be too itchy. Nonetheless, i found myself in a moment of extreme peace under the beauty of these stars.

I think there's something about nature and especially stars that direct our worship towards the supremacy of God. I asked myself, why is this such a rare occasion? Why don't i appreciate this incredible sight everyday? All my problems, worries, fears and anxieties seem to poof away. When i think about outer space, it kinda jus blows my mind how big and infinite it all is. It makes me think that there's so much more to life then our common daily concerns. Starring out at space makes me feel so small. And yet I know God cares and loves me full heartedly. The interesting thing about God is that he can give himself 100% to everyone and everything at the same time forever. He's never "afk" or too busy for us. He gives us his full undivided attention even when he's in control of multiple things, namely the entire universe.

Sometimes we miss the sunrise, the sunset, the stars, and the beauty of nature because we simply aren't present. We don't put ourselves in the way of beauty. We trap ourselves starring at screens. In the same way, i've found myself very absent from the presence of God. It's not that God isn't there, it's that i've been too distracted. When our hearts and minds are too consumed by something we think is more important, we miss out on opportunities to be present with God. I find myself thinking and worrying more about the future or my mistakes of the past rather then on the mind blowing glory and awesomeness of our God right here, right now in the present. It's kinda hard to explain, but when we truly do encounter and experience intimacy with God it feels like time stops. It's a blissful state where nothing else really matters. God cleanses the dirt, filth, pain and heaviness of our hearts, and replaces it with out of this world intense peace and joy. i cant even describe it, but u know it when u feel it. We all want to love and be loved, and we often forget that our relationship with God trumps any romantic type of love. 

What would it be like to spend just 10 seconds in the full presence of God? Now imagine heaven. I dont understand how i can live most of my days completely missing such wonderment and bliss. Why dont i take advantage of having direct access to God? why withdraw from one who rightly and perfectly loves?

I have a hard time slowing myself down. Am i too hyperactive? Do I have A.D.D? why can't i just sit still and patiently wait to commune with God? we dont always have to be doing something. I believe when we quiet ourselves in stillness, we can actively and intentionally absorb this great love that God has for us. i describe it has a burning heart sensation. We can actually feel this love, instead of jus the theological aspect to it. If God's love is as amazing as we here about, then don't u think we should be able to feel and sense it? What happens when we don't sense God? And this is why we're told to trust God by faith. I know this sounds girly, but dang God sometimes jus sweeps me off my feet.

I dont think anyone can really say God is always first in their lives. Generally that should be our desire. But even throughout a day, i noticed i have a lot of idols. Even things that are good in our life can become a distracting idol. I noticed that when i was younger i made it more of a point to intentionally spend a few moments a day in prayer and silence. Quality time with God can often come from quantity time with God. I personally lack a lot of patience and self discipline. I need to take more intention to simply abide in the presence of God. Our God communicates to us in a lot of different ways, but often times we're just not listening or attentive. If you're feeling tired, find rest in Him, if ur feeling empty, be filled by Him. What does it mean to be in the love of God? Wherever it is, I think it's a place we ought to stay. Stop to stare at the stars. Put yourself in the way of beauty.