the grind

ive been feeling exhausted lately. i guess that's been pretty usual.

Graduation for my Jr. kindergarten class went really well. It's only now starting to hit me how much i miss my little kids. There's a few kids in particular that I really bonded with. It's like parting ways with your little brothers and sisters. They were always so happy and silly. Our goodbyes seemed somewhat rushed. I also miss the preschool and my co-workers.

Anyways, now im at a new preschool and it's a little different from what I'm used to. I've been worried that I won't be able to do a good job this year because I know how much energy it requires. Now i'll have a new group of 3-4 year old kids with different faces and in a different classroom. I'll be working 40+ hours plus i'm taking full time night classes, which really doesn't leave me with much free time to myself. It's gonna be a challenging year. I just hope I can stay responsible, prepare my meals, sleep early, and do a good job with work and school.

I had dinner with my dad and was complaining about how this is gonna be a tough school year. He reminded me to have the right perspective. What we focus our thought life on, often dictates how we feel. So if we start complaining about all the negative obstacles we have to deal with, we'll definitely feel unhappy and ungrateful. But if we focus more on all the positives, we have more energy and confidence to accomplish things.

My dad told me how he met a guy who has horrible back pains and his job is to clean out the sewer gutters everyday. And of coarse no one wants that job, but he does it anyway because it provides food for his family and he doesn't have much options, until he finds another job. Work and school is stressful by definition and it's not supposed to be that fun or easy. I'm reminded to work hard, stay out of my comfort zone, and to push myself to be disciplined and responsible.

If i had a choice to be a child or an adult, i'd pick being a kid again in a second, but i guess that's just not an option. We can often do more than we think, we're stronger than we think, we can do more than we think. But at the same time we have to consider taking care of our holistic health and getting enough rest, otherwise we'll burnout fast. ok time to sleep! bye!