Deep Loss

i recommend you don't read this blog if u don't want to get sad.

Today i met with a children's hospital chaplain. Her name was Sharon. She began telling me the various responsibilities she handled each day. She went into detail about how she met with a 8 month pregnant mother this morning who had found out through ultrasound that her baby was no longer breathing. i was speechless and did my best to hold back the teary eyes. So the mother had to go through surgery later that day to have the baby removed. The chaplain said that by 35 weeks pregnant, the parents already have all the baby clothes, planning and supplies. She talked about how she asked the mom for prayer, but the mom responded, "What's the point, my baby is already dead." It was pretty heavy stuff. I don't think i'd know how to really respond to someone who just lost her child.

She also told me a story of a mother who gave birth to conjoined twins. The mother was worried that everyone would consider them some sort of freak show. The mom also had questions about how many birth certificates they should have, how she would take them home with only one baby seat, clothes, and all sorts of questions. The chaplain then mentioned that they also passed away.

Then the chaplain told me that she runs a small support group for the women who lost a child. She talked about how hard it was for them to see other mothers have children and baby showers. She shared how some of them hate the holidays and choose not to attend family get togethers. Mothers who recently lost a child would need to deal with all the people asking about their baby. I can't imagine the severe grief they go through because of their loss. Some of the mothers do get pregnant again and do have another child.  

I asked her what other challenges she faced as a chaplain. She said, "when abused children come in because of their parents." Apparently she dealt with some of the parents who would shake their child. She dealt with one case where the parent threw her child across the room and actually killed her own child. I was like.. O_O are u serious..
the chaplain also went on about how another child was born with severe brain damage and is at high risk. She talked about how she visits all the newborns and prays for them. She also told me a story of how one child would only survive a few hours after birth, and how the parents just held him for those few precious moments. I was like, "man, you have the toughest job." Of course these were the more rare cases, but i guess complications aren't as uncommon as we think.

But while she was talking, she stopped in the middle of her sentence and said, "wait. do you hear that?" across the hall a baby gave a loud healthy cry. She said with a big smile on her face, "That's a newborn's first cry." She said she hears them everyday since her office is right across the delivery room. It was pretty touching since i've never heard a newborn's first cry. It was definitely the highlight of my day to hear the first sound of a new life.